Four more weeks. That’s what the Doctor said.
Do you remember me telling you the story of my sprained ankle? If not, check out this story:
Anyway, turns out I didn’t sprain my ankle. I broke it. Or maybe it’s my leg. I’m not entirely sure, but my fibula was fractured and it’s one of the three bones that make up the ankle joint. That’s why my ankle was so swollen and bruised and I mistook it for a sprain.
Last week, I went to the clinic for a four-week follow-up. I’ve been wearing a protective boot since the fall and I was really hoping to transition out of it. Having never broken a bone in my life, I had no realistic expectation of my recovery time.
The good news is, the bone is healing nicely.
The bad news, it’s just not done yet. I need to wear the boot for at least four more weeks!
Now, don’t get me wrong. I have a lot to be thankful for. I could have broken my tibia, the weight bearing bone in my leg, or broken multiple bones or torn a ligament as well. All of these scenarios may have required a much longer recovery time. They might have hurt more too. I know that.
I also see the blessing of how this down time gave me clarity on some things.
I’ve had time to reflect. To listen. And, do you want to know what God is showing me?
I’m not completely trusting Him. I’m jumping ahead of Him, attempting to orchestrate events in my life in the way I think they need to happen.
Kind of like Abraham. God promised him a son. Promised his descendants would be more numerous than the stars. I believe Abraham trusted God for this promise, but because it was a long time in coming, he and his wife, Sarah, took matters into their own hands to make it happen sooner.
I have a tendency to do that too. How about you? Patience isn’t easy.
There’s no doubt in my heart to the vision God has given me. He’s given me excitement and a passion for sharing Young Living essential oils. With it comes community, time freedom and so much more of what I value. He brought this company and it’s life-giving products into my life at a time when I was searching for wellness and purpose. My passion for healthy living and essential oils has not wavered. God has continued to show me time and time again that he has plans to provide for me through these oils. Through Young Living.
Yet, I continue to jump ahead of Him and take matters into my own hands. I keep searching for ways to provide for myself outside my calling. The result is, I’m never happy.
I can see this now. My injury has forced me to slow down, and in slowing down, I listen. I now realize I have a trust issue. A control problem. I continue to second guess God’s good plans and purposes for me because things aren’t working out the way I anticipate.
I read these words a while back from Pastor Mark Batterson in his book Wild Goose Chase.
“In my experience, the will of God is difficult to discern because it often involves making a decision that seems irresponsible. You may have to quit a job or change majors or make a move. And, on one level, it will seem irresponsible to those who cannot see the godly motivation. But pursuing a God-ordained passion, no matter how crazy it seems, is the most responsible thing you can do.” (pg 22)
Choosing to pursue a job with no guarantee of success may seem irresponsible to some. Not to me. I’m trusting it’s the most responsible thing I can do right now. Even if I can’t see the progress and my patience is tested.
Just as my recovery from a broken bone is requiring a great deal of patience, so is my life’s journey. I want the outward and inward growth to happen overnight. I expect God’s promises to come today. They rarely do.